What is Really “Best” for Your Mom and Dad?


When we talk about the Best service? Best value? Best advice? Best care?…….What does Best really mean?

Best/adjective; of the most excellent, effective, or desirable type or quality.

“Best” is relative.  What is best for you is different than what is best for me.  Same with our mothers and fathers.  It’s just one of the reasons why care giving is so difficult.

I’ve raised one teenage daughter and am in progress with a teenage boy.  Through them, I’ve learned that one school and one type of education doesn’t work the same for all students. This is also true in elder care.  There is no one right answer, no cookie cutter approach that works best.

This is hard for some of us to believe.  For one thing, most of us like to have a sense of control and a sure thing.  We like to analyze the data and come to a definitive “right” answer.  But human beings are more complicated than that. So even if you take two people of the same age with the same diagnosis and apply the same solutions, that set of solutions will work better for one person than the other.  In fact, they could have opposite effects.  Why? Because we each have our own life experiences, we each have been taught (by our teachers, parents, religion, our experiences) different things. We each have different family dynamics and different DNA, just to name a few of the variables.

Until Big Data finds an algorithm to match all of these variables with prescribed outcomes, hiring an Advanced Aging Life Care Professional™ is the closest thing you can get to a personalized “right” answer.  To earn this registered trademark title, individuals must have a Master’s degree in a health related field, plus two years working as a care manager supervised by an expert in the field (or more experience with a different degree). They must then pass a rigorous four hour exam.

Why should this matter to you? 

It still may take some trial and error to get to the best solution for your loved one, but because we have already ruled out hundreds of other choices, your costs are lower.  The financial costs.  The emotional costs.  The stress-related costs.  You can avoid the costs of implementing the wrong strategies, and flailing through the system hoping something works.

It would be great if just moving dad into an assisted living community solved all the issues.  It would be great if you could just hire one good caregiver to move in with mom.  It would be great if the primary care doctor your husband loves could just prescribe the right combination of medications to solve his mood and behavior outbursts.  It’s just not that simple.

So let our Aging Life Care Professionals™ from LifeLinks meet with you and your family in-person to design a customized plan for your aging loved one.  You will save costs and improve your odds for success!

This blog post is an introduction to a series titled: WHY CAN’T CAREGIVING BE SIMPLE? To continue reading the series, click here.

If you don’t live in Middle Tennessee or the North Carolina Triangle, search here to find and Aging Life Care expert in your area!


gretchen napier – ceo

Gretchen Napier joined the LifeLinks team to fulfill her passion for caring for aging adults, and affecting change for the geriatric care service industry. At a very young age, Gretchen volunteered by painting fingernails for the residents in a nursing home, where she witnessed firsthand the shortcomings and “one-size-fits-all” mentality of many organizations and individuals serving seniors. With many years of experience as an assisted living administrator and a publisher of a resource guide for seniors, Gretchen saw how easy it was for aging adults to fall through the cracks of the healthcare system.  Additionally, she saw how long-distance and broken family relationships make caring for an aging loved one an overwhelming task.  This inspired Gretchen to improve the quality of life for older adults and their families across America by growing LifeLinks. In addition to the community leadership roles listed below, Gretchen is raising a 13 year old son and carrying out her vision for LifeLinks every day.

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